The Excellence of the Andros
Published 2020-06-16 natively
It is the uncertainty of the 'Trap' which separates it, the uncertainty in every point which forces an honesty in dealing with it, having to redetermine every step on impulse alone without the safeguard of knowledge. Without the self-certainty we build up through use of language, of category and conduct.
When we take someone as one thing, and find them to be another, they have escaped our grasp, and halfway along we become adrift. This person is no longer a person, a collection of character aspects, but a more complex entity, a mind with intent and desire we cannot stereotype. The Trap reveals in eminent and tangible degree the confusion and ignorance of life, our limited understanding of one-another and our imperfect knowledge of how to even pursue our own desire, not as abstract philosophical mores, but in an active and breathing person who demands account. Such a revelation, slow-burning or sharp, asks us again what it is we love, what we admire; for our love cannot be discontinuous, can it? It cannot be premised upon a lie; what we love is core enough to us that it cannot be falsified. Our love is unflinching, even when it shocks our conscious mind.
This person is interacted with without rules, without convention. Every gesture, every word, must be heartfelt, because anything else would be a self-evident charade. If we resort to seeing them as one thing or another we no longer see them, we blind ourselves, and shun them. There is no proper conduct to someone apart; they are not a person, and instead of seeing personhood we see through to their mind, their intent, their pain and pleasure. These things can only be contended with on the same level. All skin is bare before them. The term 'love' does nothing to characterize that, but it lends the term something.
Sexual fetishism thrives upon the explicit, request and gratification, and in every common relation the sexual principle is understood: present, suppressed, or disbarred. Only the Trap returns us to a state of uncertainty as to the sexual aspect, and the humanity not to ask. Even the man of dignity has in his mind some expectation from a woman, a presentiment. The Trap forces this to be reassessed. In uncertainty, only the heart can thrive, can take the bracing air and drive our actions. Spontaneity is for so many a word, for acting out a pattern already established in their mind. Few have experienced true uncertainty and had the strength of spirit to act through it. Nearly all rely upon their intellect, however feeble or overbearing, and are stupefied when it fails. Their love is an inherited pendant, pleasant but quietly inert.
What is established through uncertainty is only a concord of the heart. Those who have taken the same force that drove them toward someone and allowed it to run unrestrained, that reckless fait accompli, no longer feel uncertainty. They have attained the grace of humanity, a precious moment before death. Whatever struggles the mind may have to understand the accord, it is restored to its place as a servant to the spirit. Those who have failed are not worth mention, for of all faults to lack spirit is without remedy.
A special creature is it that can break the jade around another's heart, not through any conventional allure, but by a struggle with oneself. No-one shrugs to admire a beautiful woman, no-one profits from it. Only someone with a power above reason can express themselves outside category and language, dialectics, and thus inspire crisis in others. It is not the poverty in men to not attempt to be beautiful, for men are humble; it is their muted sentiments. Someone who has cultivated themselves has already given into admiration, being a subject of admiration, and needs no prompting. That requires, whatever the gifts of nature, a courage in this cruel world, one that can only be equaled in one exchange. It is through recognition and respect of the humanity of another, a heedless compassion for it, that any man can come to worth.
The greatest gift is to be given cause for it, and the greatest gift is to be given it.
HH.
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